Such great love.

Originally posted Sunday, December 14, 2008 at 3:18pm (EST)

So there's this guy.

There's always this guy.

But I realized - if I never get this guy, or any guy at all, for that matter...

If I am left with a life where I'm never married, always a virgin - a nun, essentially, without the black and white threads -

Then I am absolutely okay with that.

Do I want this guy? Absolutely. If I an unable to get this guy, do I hope to one day meet the right guy to become one with? Of course.

But if that does not happen, then that will be completely fine.

Why?

Because no matter what happens - if any of my aspirations are reached, or if they all fail, if my friends turn their back and my family takes away their support, if I am left absolutely alone for the entirely of my life, well then, I'm really not alone now, am I?

Because the love of Christ that fills me is enough. It is absolutely enough. And though I appreciate friendships, though I want a husband, and though I know that He does put people in my life for companionship, I do realize that I can't put all of my stock in people, because often times, they will fail. But there is One who will never fail me. He is my Father, He is my Best Friend, He is my Lover - and despite of all that I want, He is the only one I need..

Everything else just seems so trivial in comparison. All the time I've worried throughout the years over friendships - if they'd last, if they'd leave, if I was doing the right thing, all the time I've pined after boys, and my recent "fear" of never marrying - well, it really doesn't matter, because God makes up when everyone else fails. His love is perfect love - the only love I need, and it is more than enough to get me through life, absolutely happy, if I never get that guy.

Just something I've been muling over recently. Another thing God has showed me this semester. Not just the unlimited and amazing nature of His love, but how it will be enough if I don't ever get married, or if I don't get this guy, you know.